Husband 5.0

Jimmy and I saw this the other day on Jenna and Andrews blog and we thought it was so funny! We were at lunch the other day and I forgot my rings- he told me he is ok with being Boyfriend 5.0 for the day, but I am just the luckiest and have a husband 5.0! He brought me home an Orchid the other day and I absolutly love it! He loves making me happy! But read on, I know there are many of these...

Husband 101
Dear Tech Support,Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as NASCAR 6.0, NFL 5.1 and Golf Clubs 4.1.Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.What can I do?Signed,Desperate.

DEAR DESPERATE,First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.HTML and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5 and Happy Hour 7.0.Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.Good Luck!Tech Support